I do not recall the exact date now, but sometime in September I felt a lump in the bottom of my right breast. I was getting out of the shower and drying off and I felt something that I had never felt before when I was toweling off. I asked Seth if he could feel it too. He said yes. If you Google breast lumps, every site spends a lot of time telling you that it almost certainly is not cancer. So, I didn't think that it was. I made a mental note to finally get in to see a doctor for an annual exam. But, I had convinced myself that I was probably starting menopause early (or it was from stress--no, really, that's what I was thinking) and that this was not cancer. Plus, I was following a "macro counting" diet and had lost almost 20 pounds at that point and thought maybe I could just feel the lump now because I had lost weight.
About a week after this, I started to feel a lump under my right arm pit. At first it was soft and moved around and then it seemed to go away. A few days later, it was back as a more firm lump. Seth encouraged me to make that appointment.
I think that I still dragged my feet a bit but I finally went onto my Company's "Find a Doctor" website and started looking for a doctor. We moved to California a little less than a year ago at that point and I hadn't been sick at all so I hadn't needed to find one. At first, I couldn't decide if I needed a family care doctor or an OBGYN. I spent some time trying to figure that out and then I finally called a clinic from the list. I asked for a "well-woman" exam and was informed that I needed to first schedule an "intro" appointment where I would establish a relationship with a physician. After that I could make a well-woman appointment. I had to wait about a week for the intro appointment.
That appointment was on October 5. When the nurse asked why I was there, I said to establish the relationship but also because I found a lump. I have to credit my doctor, Dr. Nazli Ahmed, and the nurse, who both took the lump that I had found seriously. They did a breast exam at this appointment and did not make me come back for a well woman exam in order to get one. Everyone tells you it is probably nothing but it should be checked out. But I could see it in their faces. I remember texting Seth during this appointment, saying that they could feel the lump, too, and that they were taking it seriously. I said that I felt like I was in good hands. Since I have chronic rhinitis, I kept blowing my nose. The nurse thought I was crying and told me to not worry, until there was something to worry about.
I was given a list of providers then so that I could get a mammogram and diagnostic ultrasound. When I called to make an appointment, they said it was imperative that I find any old mammograms that I had. For reasons that now seem unbelievably stupid and naive, I had had just one previous mammogram even though I am 43 years old and my Mom had breast cancer. It was in 2007.
After my Mom had breast cancer, I wanted to get a mammogram. I checked with my insurance company and they said that because I was high risk, I could have one. And then they denied my claim. They refused to stand by what the person on the phone had told me. (Just so you know, even if they tell you the wrong thing, they don't have to stand behind their word.) I believe that I got it paid for only after my boss and HR department got involved. The doctor told me my breasts were really dense and the mammogram was hard to read. It took a lot of time and effort to get it and get it paid for and then they said that it was basically useless. So I basically thought, screw it, I won't get another until I turn 40. But then I got busy ...
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