Surgery Prep

With just a few days before surgery, I tried to get prepared. I cleaned the apartment and did all of the laundry. For reasons, I don't understand, I redecorated my bathroom in a Bora Bora tiki hut theme. When you feel that your life is completely out of your control, Amazon provides comfort. Seth took the picture below that we had blown up. We were on the other side of the coral reef fishing when we took the photo. I was super sea sick at the time.  I found the "hand crafted" masks on Amazon. There's two others that I hung on a different wall. They look kind of mean in the photo but they are actually kind of happy looking.

The hospital said I would need a robe so I bought one of those on Amazon, too. (Pro tip: You don't need one. If you really care if someone sees your ass after repeatedly discussing bowel movements, and palpitating your breasts you have bigger problems that a robe will not solve.)

I digress. On the day before surgery (March 21), my gym did a special Rachel's WOD. These are my favorite movements although someone inserted wall balls into the workout. Rachel does not love wall balls. That farmer's carry was no joke. When I started the carry, I started reflecting on my journey with cancer (barf that I called it a journey) and then my forearms started to burn and I thought, screw cancer, I gotta get moving or my arms are going to fall off.

 I don't think I can adequately put into words how much it meant to me that OCCF did a special WOD for me and that a lot of people showed up at 6 am just to workout with me. (6 am is really damn early!) So much love to my OCCF family. The best people! (For some reason, I look like I am the only one who sweated. People have promised that this was not true. I am not sure. But I wanted to wear the Wonder Woman shirt and it is cotton and shows lots of sweat.)

I'm going to be honest, though. On this day, I was starting to get so pissed about having to have my boob cut off. I could not wrap my head around the fact that I would go to "sleep" and wake up with only one boob. Chemo is awful but at least your body parts are in tact. I wasn't quite sure how to deal with my anger because everyone always compliments you on being positive and stuff. I DID NOT FEEL POSITIVE. I felt like this was utter bullshit. See those dumbbells in my hands, I wanted to throw those through a window or something that would make a loud crashing noise.

But there was literally nothing I could do about it so I had a light dinner and didn't eat or drink anything after midnight and got myself ready for an 8 am check-in at the hospital.